Dear Susan and Dave,
Greetings from Langley, Virginia, USA.
I have read with great interest you blog, and the letters associated with your stalking and harassment as your blog popped up on my computer on a search.
A little about me, I am a retired criminal profiler who has worked for many agencies of the US government during my lifetime, My wife has asked me to take up a hobby rather than examining cases on the news papers or the Internet but I can tell you this is my happy place.
I have made some notes as to observations and conclusions I have made about your stalker.
In my past work life, I found Stalking behavior, while varied, often stems from a desire for control, power, or revenge, as well as a need for intimacy or a sense of entitlement.
In all the cases that I have solved, stalkers can be individuals who have been rejected in a relationship, feel resentful, or simply have a distorted view of their target and their own abilities in relationships.
These behaviors can range from persistent unwanted communication and unwanted attention to following, spying, making threats and in a lot of cases injuring or killing pets, or loved ones, Even damage to property owned by the person being stalked.
Stalkers generally have a strong, often unhealthy, attachment to their target, leading to constant thoughts and actions related to them, A term I have used with victims is “you live in their head rent free”.
In a lot of cases Stalkers have turned out to be persons who believe they deserve a relationship with the victim, despite their rejection or lack of interest.
In the case of my investigations, I have had reason to interview alleged stalkers while a case was being built against them, I found them to be self-absorbed, lacking empathy and an inability to consider the victim’s perspective and I was not surprised when they were criminally charged.
Stalkers tend to punish or control their target for perceived wrongs or mistreatment’s they perceive they were subject to.
Having dealt with many stalking cases for law enforcement over the years, The majority of stalkers struggle with romantic relationships and may have delusional beliefs about their target, such as believing they are already in a relationship with the targets, In my experience many had mental health conditions which played a role in stalking behavior, particularly for resentful or intimacy-seeking stalkers.
When we built a case, we typically looked into their past records on our criminal databases, school records, hospital records, In-fact any records that were unsealed.
We would then build a story board of this person with the information we gleamed. We typically found that a lot of stalkers were sexually motivated, In the case of males they typically had erectile dysfunction or were chronic masturbators. When the case progressed court appointed psychologists found that these people were victims of sexual abuse by one or both parents, which lead to their struggle with intimacy and romantic relationships.
Female stalkers on the other hand were predominantly single, heterosexual, educated individuals in their mid-30s who had pursued their victims for more than a year.
Major mental disorder and personality disorder were suggested, especially borderline personality disorder. They usually threatened violence, and if they did threaten, were more likely to be violent.
Frequency of interpersonal violence was 25 percent, but there was limited use of weapons, and injuries were minor.
Stalking victims were most likely to be slightly older male acquaintances; but if the victim was a prior sexual intimate of the female stalker, her risk of being violent toward him exceeded 50 percent.
Unlike male stalkers who often pursue their victims to restore intimacy, these female stalkers often pursued their victims to establish intimacy.
Common emotions and motivations included anger, obsessional thoughts, rage at abandonment, loneliness, dependency, jealousy, and perceived betrayal. Stalkers who are motivated by sexual intent and may target strangers, often women or children.
In my experience when we raided an alleged stalkers home or premises, we typically found squalor, hording, filth, discarded rubbish on the floor, unchanged bedclothes and in a lot of cases soiled bed clothes, when psychologists interviewed the charged suspect, it revealed that many were chronic bedwetters with no concept of hygiene other than when they presented their street face was somewhat tolerable.
Your stalker seems obsessed with you as this harassment has continued for almost 6 years, The sheer volume of letters suggests to me this person in unemployed, does not have a social life or a social support network, they do not have a partner and more importantly children thankfully, They are a loner, unemployed, I would go as far to suggest they are unemployable, It would be safe to assert they are living on food stamps and their weekly social security cheque possibly supplemented by criminal behavior or in the case of a woman low level street corner prostitution.
Some of the comment on your blog suggest that this person is living in squalor and “sitting in a puddle of their own pee while writing these letters, I would suggest that this would be a fair claim.
My worry is that there could be future physical violence towards you both or members of your family, it could be in the form of a letter bomb or a poisonous substance in the letters, I would wear gloves when opening letters and proceed with caution if in doubt call the local authorities .
On the other hand the fact that this person has not contacted you in over 7 week could suggest they have been incarcerated either for criminal exploits or that they maybe in a mental health facility “most likely”, An even simpler solution is they may have died as typically I found that many stalkers had substance abuse issues which they needed to feed, Men typically stole property or held up stores for cash or alcohol, while women typically prostituted themselves for money for drugs or alcohol .
I was reading the case of the Stockport killer in the UK, a young man who had all the issues noted above, Sadly for the victims he ended up killing three young children, From reading the letters on line I have come to conclusion your stalker is deranged and depraved much like he is, However I would like to explore this more, Is there anyway I could get copies of the other letters ?
You have my e-mail address; I have no issue with you publishing this email as long as my name is not mentioned or my email address disclosed.
Please be careful I hope to hear from you soon.